A memory; A reminder
“It is better to light a candle than to curse the darkness.”
A proverb caught my attention throughout my school years. It is printed on lightweight cardboard, with a dark background accommodating the single image presented upfront — a singular candle lit amidst a dark and vast void.
Initially hung near the stairs of the 2nd floor of my junior high school building, throughout the rest of my high school years, it was placed on the left side of the wall in my school lobby, hidden and tucked away behind the lobby’s pillar and the backside of the hall door.
Written in what I believe to be an Arial-esque font, the display shows that the proverb was sourced from a compilation of Chinese proverbs. However, I later discovered that Eleanor Roosevelt made the quote infamous. Although different sources determine the saying — translating the meaning as I understand it goes the following:
“It is better to act upon a problem (light a candle) rather than sit around and complain about a problem (curse the darkness).”
I guess some part of it resonates with my nature. A gift or a curse, it is a burden I will always have — trying to carry all the load, performing things out of dependency that, in fact, I seldom need anyone’s help for. The fix-it attitude I have will always stem from observing the multitude of errors not in principle to my view.
In previous writings, I saw the error of my ways. Not necessarily a complete mistake of thinking, but the application of it seems to vary from time to time. Not all candles should be lit in the face of darkness; sometimes, we have to bear the darkness in one way or another — as one day, it will come to pass.
But rather a prompt of questions now gather, to which I ask: will there be a difference if I hadn’t strongly forced the hands of fate? Should I face the darkness all on my own? Will the candles light back in the end?
It is wrong to have regrets and potentially give thought to the “what if,” but however bothersome it might be, despite what happened — some part of me cannot accept that all of this happened on a whim of excitement determined by the nature of such conditions.
Time will only tell that after all of this has gone by, I now know when to light the candle and when not to. As we endeavor through the darkness, it is better not to curse the period but to embrace it.
Now, I am trying to navigate my way through all of this; until I’ve come to terms with the fact that — in the grand scheme of things — not all battles have to be fought for. Some battles should be avoided, and some should be fought for, as we always have the choice to determine which is worth fighting for.
